QOTD: area 52

question of the day: what do you like best about the area you currently live in?

Favorite part: Having a neighborhood and a little forrest in the back. Least favorite: Taxes and the knowledge that [coworker] lives 10 minutes away

Well…there’s only traffic in the summertime and I’m currently not paying rent. So that’s pretty cool. Oh yeah, and the best wings ever in the seediest bar ever are really close by. It doesn’t take much.

The best thing about our area is that there are more golf courses and they are not as crowded as Mercer County courses. And, they are less expensive and the rangers are much nicer.

the diversity. it effects everything in the area: attitude, bars, restaurants, housing, etc.

The registered sex offenders are the friendliest neighbors.

Convenience, I have everything right around the corner, such as crack, glocks, and the occasion crack whore. I guess that would be at the corner instead of around the corner.

I’m close to New Jersey Transit, live right off the Garden State, can walk to the best restaurants in town, can walk to 8 bars and 4 clubs, its trendy w/out being overly exposed, great punk and electronica music stores and my neighbors are HOT!! Don’t have to look far for the poon.

All of my family and friends live close by. We're close to Philly, NYC, Atlantic City, the beach and the mountains -- you can do it all, right here in good old NJ. I like the fact that we get all 4 seasons. Things move at a good pace around here, not like in Alabama or some place like that where everything is just a little slower.

I like being in a suburban setting, yet still being close to so many things. I can get to 3 different malls within 20 minutes of my house. In less than 10 minutes I can get to I-95, Rt. 1 or the PA Turnpike. Downtown Philly is less than 30 minutes and New York is about and hour and a half. Not that I go anywhere, but I could. I'm not crazy about the weather here though. It's great that we don't have to worry too much about earthquakes, tornadoes, or hurricanes. But, in any given year there are probably only about 20 days of really good weather.

that i am 15 minutes away from the beach.

It’s clean. It’s quiet (sans the fire siren right across from my apt). It’s safe. The people are nice. There are many cool restaurants and bars just blocks from each other. There are trees and other green things growing and smelling good. The river is 3 blocks away. The architecture is cohesive and appropriate, giving the city a picturesque appearance. The area has a pulse/soul that makes me feel good.

A wawa that is within walking distance. Cha-ching!

QOTD: kids

question of the day: if you had a choice, would you rather adopt or have your own kids? or no kids at all? why?

Oh, I do want to raise a family of my own. I want to see if I can screw up worse than my parents did. However, I think I would want my own and would not want to adopt. Why go pot luck with someone else’s product and jacked up scrambled egg genes. No thank you.
-Yes sir that is correct, I will have the half Samoan, half French autistic ADD midget boy with the stump…your kidding, he has been available for 8 years?
That is what the circus and carnivals are for…

adopted or not, chilldren are blessings... ok most of them

No kids at all, kids are bad ummmkay. I drop them off at the pool every day around 10am, or whenever they act up.

No kids at all, they're a life-long headache. Being responsible for another person's life just isn't my bag, baby.

i want kids... ideally four - realistically three. if for whatever reason i couldn't have kids, i'd definately adopt. i like the idea of a home filled with kids...i think my life would be boring without them.

I’d like to have my own, but if it isn’t possible I would go without kids. As much as I think adopting is a great and noble idea, there are a lot of costs involved and I don’t think my husband and I would be able to afford the adoption process and then actually raise the kid. So if I can’t pop my own out, I’d just save money for retirement and take at least one fantastic vacation a year.

I can't have kids....They're obnoxious.

I'll stick with having my own kids. The first one seems to be working out pretty well.

have my own....More fun making them than adopting

Own. Never lease.

My plan is to have twins and get it all out of the way at once.

I'd like to adopt and have my own kids; preferably around 15 of them. Statistically speaking, I'd eventually end up with one that has all the traits and qualities I'd want in a child (obviously that one would become my favourite). Plus, we, as Americans, need to do our part in catching up with the Chinese and Indians in population explosion and disparity in labour wages. I fully expect my children to hold down jobs starting at age 5. This way I can retire knowing I did right by the economy AND my country. Oh and adopting kids from foreign nations would allow us to take away from their population (and eventual workforce) and transplant them here. This way we can start competing with the $1.50/hr they pay their workers to sew or put together televisions. It's all part of my master plan to rule the world. To do that I need minions. Naturally, I'm talking about my offspring. So you'd better start being nice to me, or expect a pint sized assasin to visit you.

QOTD: sexy and 17

question of the day: do you think you would be friends with your 17 year old self? why or why not?

nah, looser

hell no....I was too annoying back then

yes....i was cool.....

hehehe i'm not too sure - i was quite different back then

Nah, I don't hang out with losers. Oh, that reminds me - I can't hang out with you anymore.

No. He'd just want to borrow my car.

probably. i think im pretty much the same, but i would have a lot to teach my 17 year old self. however, my 17 year old self might be a huge bitch to the future me, and in that case i would slap the 17 year old me and tell her to grow the hell up.

Hah. Good question. I get along really well with my almost-17-year-old brother, so I take that as a sign that I would. Then again, he’s not a 17-year-old girl, so it’s really up in the air.

Yeah, I would definitely be friends with my 17 year old self. We have a lot in common still. He probably wouldn't hang out with me though, because he has a seriuos girlfriend and doesn't hang out with his boyz that much anymore.

Of course I would, I'm still that person.

Hell no. I was too into sports and I didn’t smoke or really drink. I lived a really sheltered life playing sports hoping to get a scholarship to college. Plus my 17 year old self would think that my 32 year old self was a really big loser. So there is no way we’d be BFF.

hell yeah, 17 was an awesome age for me. Life was good,

most definately... i was insanely confident, did great in school, fun, and looked good. sad reality is i peaked at 17. oh well.

Sure I would. Only I would beat the tar-nation out of him if he didn’t pick up his grades, stop skipping school and to lay off the blunts. That stuff only got him in trouble.

QOTD: lies lies lies

question of the day: what is something you were told as a child that as you grew older, you discovered to be false? (such as: "if you keep making that face your face will freeze like that!”)

My Mom used to tell me that “hate is a very strong word.” While she’s technically correct, here and there I have found cases where it’s not strong enough. Perhaps, this is a bit pessimistic, but it is a rainy Monday. OK, fine, she’s totally right. But still…

i will turn blind

if you swallow gum it will stick to your insides

There are nine planets in our solar system.

That "you shouldn't take drugs because drugs are bad, 'mkay?"

That I was adopted [done to keep me from making un-reasonable demands]

if you keep playing with that, you'll go blind!

if i ate all my carrots I'd have good eye sight. glasses and contact suck!

something about hairy palms....

eating watermellon seeds will make a watermellon grow in our stomachs.

1) An apple a day keeps the dentist away. 2) If you sit too close to the TV, your brain will rot. 3) A bird in the hand is worth 2 in the bush. 4) The tooth fairy and Hannukah Harry don't actually exist. 5) Everything you need to know you learn in kindergarten.

that everything is in God's hands - its not, its in our own.

Sandy Claws and the Ether Bunny.

I'd go blind

My palms will get hairy

you grow hair on your palms if you....

ummmm...that if i whack off too much, my hands will get hairy and i will go blind.....

Top 10 Things Told that are WRONG
10) Father did not walk 12 miles uphill in the snow to school, each way, barefoot
9) Money does indeed grow on trees, if one invests in Tropicana
8) There is no Uncle Snerd. He will not come if I don't clean my room
7) I'm not really Polish, just really stupid (it's the thought that counts..love you dad)
6) That old '81 AMC Concord will not be worth money some day
5) Uncle Ron is not big boned. He really is fat
4) Substituting CRISCO for butter is not healthier, it's worse, and IS very noticible in baking
3) I will not and did not loose my hair
2) Carob does not taste like chocolate..it's disgusting
And #1
YOU WILL NOT GO BLIND ...

QOTD: crush puny humans!

question of the day: what do you do when you get angry?

pee

Swear, you f*cknut!

depends where i am...who is around...what i am mad about....Sometimes, i just blow up but usually i just bite my lip...it really depends on the person. and......sometimes i slam the door!!!

Oh…get some combo of sarcastic and sulky. It’s a lovely combination, really.

get real quiet and don't talk for a little...and if i am still angry, probably explode and bitch the person out like whoa. its truly scary.

stutter, curse like those are the only words i know, create elaborate argument schemes in my head as practice for later, smoke a lot, scream, cry and touch my hair a lot

i get quiet

laugh. kinda like im gonna do something I shouldn't

depends what it's about. sometimes, i get so mad that i cry, but other times i get so mad that i want to hit stuff.

I start to sweat and my heart starts racing. Then all I see is red. After that, I usually don't remember much and I start to wonder why I'm all covered in blood.

Curse like a sailor and smoke like a chimney. Then I get very quiet, sort of the calm before the storm while I plan my retaliation.

Kick bugs. Punch fruit. Curse Deities. And quietly devise a plan for retribution.

I try to never let things bother me so much that I actually get angry. Not many people have ever seen me in that state. I usually laugh in an attempt to not let the emotion surface. If I can’t shake the thoughts, I vent it all out on Melinda when I get home. So, for anyone who has shared a living space with me, they know that if they hear music from my room when I come home from work, stay away until I’m done.

Get bigger and start turning green. My shirt buttons come whizzing off like tiny chinese stars of death as my shirt gets tighter and tighter on my burgeoning chest until it rips completely off. Finally my jeans split at the seams and mysteriously get ripped off below the knees. After that I just go rampaging through walls until I calm down and return to normal. fairly typical, I think.

QOTD: the password is...

question of the day: tell me a password you use for something (but don’t tell me what it is for!)

8330719#

sob117

lick

1225 - and it has nothing to do with christmas.

urastalker

I know a phishing scam when I see one.

******

I use "bitch*slap" a lot. The * makes it tricky to guess!

"ahole1234" because I was annoyed to have to change it every couple of months, so I decided to use curse words with numbers.

idiotbox

douchebaggery.

Are you serious? What if I use the same password for everything? What if it is a verbal password to get into the VIP area of the Hustler Club? Why would I want to share that? What if, saying it out-loud, will cause a 17 yr old girl to go into a spastic rage and kick everyone’s tail? > Feather02 (although with that last statement, I think I will start using 1Miranda)

doodlebutt

questionoftheday

Hjn468

beerme

QOTD: the plan

question of the day: where do you see yourself in 5 years?

not in NJ

Finishing up my Ph.D. and far, far from this cube.

as your father

At the cubicle to your left.

hopefully happily married and getting close to being out of corporate america!

retired and revered

at my 6th annual 29th birthday party.

I'd rather not think about it. I might puke. I didn't see myself doing the same lame-ass job here for 5 years, but that's what happened.

eek - hopefully married with a kid and another degree. according to a chinese horoscope i got - REALLY good things will happen to my career in about four to five years. dont' know if its true, but it was nice to hear. and i hope it comes true! oh and i see all this in california

Sleeping. That's a realistic goal.

Are you asking for my 5 year plan? This is too much pressure. I don't even know what I want for lunch today! Well, I definitely don't see myself being married up with a bunch of kids where the only highlight in my week is a trip to Bed, Bath and Beyond to pick out new bath mats. That just looks way to boring for me. Hopefully by then, I will have found a way to get around the "road block" in the "avenue" of my career.

Same job, owning a house and a dog. Probably still in and out of relationships, although it would be nice to settle down and start a family. Possibly may have furniture business up and running (finally). AND will be 5 years closer to my ultimate goal of global domination. Someone needs to take over the world…I’m just a little smarter than The Brain, just with no current sidekick, hence the dog (I refuse to name him Pinky..cause that is a mouse’s name..Narf!!)…

drunk in a ditch somewhere screaming about how cute puppies are. i guess in five years i hope i will be done with my home projects, and working at a university doing something relevant and interesting.

Is it just me, or does it seem that the “controller” of QOTD is amassing a huge database on all of us and may very well be planning to:
1. Sell such said data to vicious, online marketing scoundrels
2. Use it to blackmail us when, and if we ever cross him/her
3. Through careful analysis find a way to get into our inner psyches and make us all his/her slaves
4. Figure out what each and everyone of us really wants for Christmas

QOTD: usedtas

question of the day: what is something you used to like but don't anymore? why?

tequila

asparagus. bad dinner

i used to like to clean - now i just hate it - its a nuisance and a waste of time

asking this stupid question every day

I used to like Ham and Cheese Hot Pockets. Once I quit smoking, though, I think my taste shifted or something, b/c I started to hate them. Weird.

QOTD, the question asker, baked ziti, fish sticks, [co-worker's] mom, bathing, waking up in the morning.

I used to like mullets but not now because I don't have enough hair on top anymore. Otherwise, I'd totally be rockin' a mullet.

cotton candy, swinging on monkey bars, and running through the sprinkler.. because cotton candy is TOO sweet, i can't do the freaking bars anymore, and the sprinkler... a 20something running through water in the grass is just dumb.

i used to like golf but now i hate it...Why, because now i SUCK!!!!!!

Christmas. The whole gift-giving tradition is lame once you grow up and make your own income. If people don't ask you what you want, you'll probably get something that you don't want and will have to return it to the store. Your present is now AN ERRAND! If you are asked what you want, you deny yourself buying said items oct-dec. I've been trying to persuade my family to go with my gift giving strategy.... Form a circle. Pass a twenty to the person at your left, say 'merry xmas'. Turn to your right, say 'thank you'.

I used to enjoy running and jogging. Now I am old and out of shape. It's too hard. Now I only run if I am going to miss the train, or if I'm being chased.

several different men. because they're jerks.

so many things come to mind, but mostly music styles. i used to love metal, but i can hardly listen to one song before i get bored or annoyed anymore. same goes for nirvana, sonic youth, and all of that era/genre. i also used to really like broccoli stems, but now i hate them too.

pickled herring. i loved it as a kid, before i knew what it was. now just the thought of it makes me sick.

KISS (and all those bands that don’t know when to quit). What the hell? Bands that drag their legacy through the mud for years, not contributing a damn thing to culture/society should be shot dead where they stand. Face paint and music, from an adult’s point of view, is just a ridiculous. Learn to move on or cease to exist! That’s what I say. No rock band, I repeat, NO ROCK BAND should EVER stay together for more than 15 years. Nothing good can come from hanging out with the same losers for that long. I challenge anyone one to show me a rock band that is breaking new ground and isn’t embarrassing themselves on stage after 15 years. Guys in their 50’s and 60’s should not be singing about sex, drugs, rebellion, and all that youthful angst stuff. It’s just sad. Really, really sad.

I used to enjoy finding the cheapest beer possible. Now I am much more into quality over quantity.

Tom Cruise

QOTD: presents

question of the day: what's the best present you have ever given someone?

(censored)

ME, what type of question is that?

I gave your mom a ride on the bone roller coaster. Whoooo!

Oh, this one is easy.... an 'O'.

i am thinking a computer

Two small, smuggled Thai children who create jewelry on demand, for my wife. Their delicate fingers are perfect for setting gems and they require little to no overhead. When they're finished, we just stuff them under the stairs - compact, convenient, and cheap!

LOVE

I dated this chick in high school who wasn't that well off financially. We both loved winter sports, but the jacket that she had was old and gross. So, for Christmas, I bought her this really fancy coat for $300. Not bad for a high school kid working as a delivery driver for the greatest fried chicken restaurant ever invented.

I threw my husband a surprise party for his 30th birthday. He never saw it coming. The look on his face when we walked in was priceless.

last year for christmas, i got my dad this ryobi rechargeable tool set with a flashlight, a reciprocating saw, and a drill and possibly some other stuff that i cant remember. aside from the fact that he loves it, its also a great gift because the rechargeable batteries are interchangeable for a million of their tools, so you can just keep giving a new tool for all occasions. i never thought any of those words would come from me.

Tough question. I would say the gift of being a good brother to my older sister. Sounds corny, but she knows that there is nothing I wouldn’t do for her. Whether it’s painting her house or just being there for her when she needs someone to talk to. I even walked her down the aisle at her wedding. She viewed it as one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever given her, but it was one of the greatest honors I have ever had. Saying that makes me feel like I have a vagina or something. Somebody shoot me.

QOTD: money

question of the day: would you rather have a well paying job that you hate, or a job that you love that doesn't pay very well? why?

a high paying job that i hate, so that at least when i get home, i'm coming back to a big beautiful house

a job that i love, bc ultimately you have to get up everyday and want to go. if you hate it, you won't want to

a job i love, because money sucks and i'm sick of caring about it. i just want to be happy, and money doesn't do it for me.

Definitely leaning toward the latter lately…if you make a decent salary, but you’re stressed out and miserable, the money doesn’t really lead to much happiness.

job i love

Well, I've worked the poor-paying job that I like for a while now and dealt with it. But, now we have a child that we need to put in day care and we have no idea how we're going to pay for it. I might have to lean more toward the higher paying job at this point.

a job that i love that doesn't pay very well - you spend most of your life at work - you may as well enjoy it - and money definitely doesn't buy happiness.

I’ve had both situations and they both were good and bad. This is a toss up. Currently, I love my job and get paid well. So now I can go down to Mexico for the Donkey Show any time I want and not regret going back to work on Monday…………

I'd have to say low-paying enjoyable job, because no matter where I work, I'll always have the perception that I'm underpaid; and a high-paying job that I hate would probably be a job I'd never do anyway (dangerous, tons of manual labor).

I'd rather have a job that I love that doesn't pay very well, because I tried it the other way and it doesn't work. I can't put a price on being unhappy every single day.

I’d prefer a job I love that doesn’t pay as well. I’ve had miserable jobs before that paid pretty well and it is just like a rash that spreads into the rest of your life. I’d rather be happy.

Breakfast of champions?

There’s nothing I love more than holding the office door open for two mountainous fat brawds who can’t open the door themselves because they’re hands and arms are stacked so full with cookies, muffins, and mocha-chocha-triple-frappa-latinos. All for themselves. Breakfast of champions? I think not. I think it’s more like the “breakfast of someone that won’t live past 39.” Ever hear of oatmeal ladies? And I hear they have some mighty tasty yogurts on the market. You may want to look into it.

They probably spent about $20 each on their breakfast in the cafeteria. I don’t even have $20 in my wallet. So that tells me that someone that can afford to spend that much money on breakfast is probably making a lot more than me. So we’re busy investing company money in people that spend quite a while eating on company time. And we’re investing company money in people that obviously don’t give a damn about how long they live. So that means when they have a heart-attack and can’t come into work, we’ll have to train someone else to do their job. How smart is that?

And the person doing their job will probably be me. And I probably won’t get a raise for it either. So I still won’t be able to afford any breakfast. Thanks a lot fatties.

QOTD: first dates

question of the day: what was your first ever date and how did it go?

it was ok. it was on vacation with the family, i went out to the movies when they thought i was out with my friend

i was in 6th grade...Think we went to the movies. it went very well...I was the biggest stud in the school.

I have blocked it out of my memory.

I'm going to guess the number of responses with words to the effect of "it was your mom and I nailed her".... Five.

my first "date" was to the movies. we saw armageddon. it went well. neither of us could drive so my cousin and her coworker (who were on a date) picked us up and dropped him off somewhere...we were just driving and he says...this is fine.. but we were in the middle of no where. so weird.

i went to see groundhog day with louie galasso. he was small and weird, and it was more of a group date thing because i think i was in 5th grade and wouldnt have been allowed to go otherwise. thank god nothing awful happened, because i love groundhog day, and it would be a travesty if that movie was ruined by a shitty date.

does stalking count?

it was a movie date, can't remember the movie, with a few other friends in 5th grade. three couples i think. Basically was a make out session in the movie theater. First real kiss, she was a well matured 5th grader who had a mouth full of braces. Pretty good time. I hit a triple on my next date. Flew passed second. Crazy kids.

After show and tell, we took a little walk down to the sandbox. The sunlight was shining in her hair and the smell of paste was still on her lips. Ahhh, kindergarten was a very special time in my life.

I honestly don’t remember. As a matter of fact I don’t think there was ever the official “guy coming to the door to pick me up and Dad waiting with a shotgun” scenario. I grew up in the middle of nowhere and we usually hung out at other peoples houses since it took 45 minutes to get to the movies.

I was never chauffeured around by mom to pick up a girl for a 'date'. So I guess I'm a loser and my dates all happened when I started driving. I asked her out in the school library, and we went out. It was either dinner and a movie or dinner and bowling. It ended early in the night, but we went out again and again. I think that usual "3rd date" event was on date 18 or something. I'd like to meet up with her again in the future, to show her how good I got.

I was eighteen, my brother got me a prostitute. My brother tips well, so the date ended as a huge success!

Her name was Angela and it was one of the last days of life in middle school, the 8th grade. I always kinda liked her and finally musted up the guts to ask her out, knowing that this was my last chance. She was to move away that summer. On somewhat of a double date, we went for pizza and played some Frisbee in the park. No first kiss, but still would say it was a pretty successful first date for the awkward pre-high school student I was then. We hung out alittle on different occasions after that. We never kept in touch after she moved, with the exception of a card that she mailed later that summer. Life is full of many opportunities, if you have the courage to step up to bat. That is what that date taught me.

QOTD: hospital

question of the day: when was the last time you were in a hospital, and what was it for?

2 weeks ago, fixing a problem, isn't that what most visits are for

went to go hang out with my brother there a couple months ago.

1999. Playing hockey, got hit in the chin. Needed stiches

December 31, 2004. I broke my wrist(s) snowboarding. Happy New Year to me!

Got a dogbite while out biking. I no longer wear that steak-scented t-shirt.

June 20th - June 22nd for the birth of my son and March 9th of this year for ACL replacement surgery.

funny story... last Tuesday I went to Red Bank to see a Q&A with Kevin Smith, followed up by a screening of Clerks. We had to park in the hospital parking lot across the street from the park where they were showing the movie. In order to pay for the parking I had to go inside the hospital and get a token.

I've never been as a patient, but I was in a hospital a little over a month ago for the birth of my daughter. It was 90 degrees outside, but I had to bring long-sleeve shirts with me because they keep it so cool in there.

My best friend had a baby a week and a half ago so I went to visit them while they were still in the hospital.
As for me being there for treatment myself, jeez that was a long time ago. It would have been 1996 and I was drunk and fell on my face and unconscious and bleeding from my lip. The ambulance had to come and get me because I wouldn’t wake up and I was bleeding all over the floor. I woke up in the ER and didn’t know where I was, and was belligerent and refused treatment. My roommates came and picked me up and I went home, changed my shirt and went back out. When we got to the bar my legend preceded me and the bartender would only serve me water.

last time i was in one was probably when i had my MRI of my knee....

Boob job. Not reduced or enlarged, but one was added in the middle of my back--for dancing!

The last time I was in the hospitol was to see my uncle. The last time I was admitted was when I broke my back.

No Question Day?!

There are few things that you see in your life as being more important than your answers to your co-workers' blog that features a Question of the Day. Each day when the question arrives via a messaging service that happens instantly, a grin can be seen carving its path across your face. Once your grin reaches full smile status, hilarious potential answers go screaming through your head. Like that one day where the question was "if you were a vehicle, what kind would you be?"

It took you a good 20 minutes to narrow it down between your funniest two answers: "a van, so I can put a couch in the back and make out with hookers" or "a dump truck, since the back is big enough to fit 9 hookers."

But today when the time rolls around for the question to come out, there will be no message that occurs instantly. In its place however, there will be a grin that never fully forms into a smile which will be accompanied by hilarious potential answers that will never be laughed at.

Happy No Question Day?!

QOTD: cubism

question of the day: what does your cube neighbor do that annoys you?

There is one particular neighbor that is quite possibly the most bitter person on earth. He could win a million dollars and still find something wrong with it. Another neighbor taps/shakes his leg on the floor and it makes the walls of my cube and my desk shake.

fart

whistling. God I can't stand the whistling.

she plays her music *just loud enough* to be annoying. No big deal, I'm moving to a new desk next week.

i know my one old cube neighbor used to drink out of a big thermos and every time he finished drinking from it he would slide it across his desk and slam it into his cube wall - the ajoining cube wall - and everything on my wall would shake and sometimes fall off - not to mention making a loud banging noise.

nothing

Lives. Breathes. I could go on and on.

this guy in the help desk speaks very loud plus he uses these phrases that make me want to kill myself. In short it sounds like the scene from Office Space where he has to listen to that operator say the same things over and over. "Corprate councils payroll, Nina speaking. Just a moment." I want to take a bat and, nevermind I don't want to get fired for this.

My neighbor is [coworker]. His simple existance is annoying!!

write the question of the day.

[coworker] is a perfect neighbor....[coworker] has meetings and doesn't shut the hell up!!!!!

Am I a bad person if I say breathe?

I really don't sit in a cube, I'm kinda between two cubes, But if i had to say one thing that my cube neighbor does that annoys me it would probably be not saying good morning when they walk in. A simple acknowledgement in the morning would be nice. If I don't say anything to her she sometimes won't talk to me all day.

i have some nice cube neighbors, so i shouldn't really complain, but one of them says often 'it like i says...'

Some of them sneeze a whole lot. Some of them chat constantly. And some of them are so quiet, you can hardly even tell that they're there.

The guy to my left sneezes really loud and it scares the crap out of me. The guy to the right is a long-distance talker - he calls people's names that sit five cubes away. The guy across from me punches his phone buttons REALLY HARD when checking his voicemail - I'm surprised he hasn't broken the damn thing yet.

SNORT, SNORT, SNORT!!!!

cubicle knocking, blasting off in his chair every time he gets up, staring at me while he talks on the phone, hovering while asking inane questions, talking to me while i eat breakfast, asking how my weekend was every day, reading whatever is on my screen, lingering too long after a conversation has ended, chewing loudly, smelling like a vat of cheap perfume, tapping too much, or squeaking an annoyingly noisy chair...i could go on forever

I have 2 new cube neighbors. They feel that they are the wittiest of all creation. So much that they feel the need to explain their jokes, as the rest of the cube neighbors are not intelligent enough. In reality, even their sarcasm is sub par...

My cube neighbors are chatterboxes personified. They not only talk to each other by visiting each other but talk over the cubes – you guessed it, loudly. I sometimes wish I could wish them mute, or cast a spell where in they are sent down an evolute that never ends or smack them on the face so hard that their tongue sticks to the other cheek wall rendering them … yes yes ..speechless. I think its definitely annoying

my cube neighbor is the printer and it annoys me because of all of it's visitors.

QOTD: down the shore

question of the day: whats your favorite jersey shore beach? why?

sandyhook, my friend works there, i get free parking/drinks

Wildwood....Best Boardwalk....Sucks that the ocean is a mile away from the boardwalk though

sea isle city - big beaches, no new yorkers, great bars, even better food

LBI. It's the best because of all the mini golf places!!!

harvey cedars on lbi, because i spent a lot of time there with an ex-bf, and have great memories of that.

Point Pleasant is my favorite beach for its hot women, good funnel cake, the best pizza around and don't forget about the Tiki Bar.

LBI. It’s a haven for pyrates.

In my twenties, I would have said North Wildwood because of the bars and boardwalk. Now that I'm married and have a kid I might have to pick somewhere a little more family-friendly like Ocean City. Avalon and Stone Harbor are nice if you can afford a nice place. But, being a Philly boy my Jersey shore experience is limited to the places mentioned above and A.C., Cape May and Sea Isle. I went to L.B.I. a couple years ago. I wasn't that impressed.

Brigantine. Because it's not A.C.

beach haven. bathrooms close by, easy parking.

used to be avon in high school because it was clean and there was a nice long beach. but nowadays - i like the long branch beach. there are nice bars, good restaurants, a pretty boardwalk and its 10 minutes from home. - can't beat that.

I kinda like Cape May. It’s quiet and out of the way. Belmar (spelling) is nice too. Wildwood has a boardwalk, but it’s too crowded and is dirty. If I’m lying on a beach, I want to either be lying next to or have direct view of a hot chic, not a dirty diaper filled with Indian food.

LBI but it's too damn far from me now... so I just yuck it up with the guidos at Sleazeside or go to Pt Pleasant

seaside - cause nothing beats a ton of white trash all in one place

Oof, they’re all rough in my opinion but if I was forced to pick I’d lean towards Spring Lake. The houses are beautiful to look at on the drive in when you are stuck in traffic, and usually they keep it pretty clean, free of both garbage and NYC riff-raff.

QOTD: i mean seriously

question of the day: how do they get the cars into the mall?

psychoflexic powers. telekewhatsis

Ha ha ha ha ha…I have no freakin’ idea!!!

"Hmm...new Oldsmobiles are in early this year. Pier One Imports!"

through the doors... LOL

I don't know how they get them in there... but I know the reason they put them in there is so that all the birds flying around inside the mall have a place to go to the bathroom.

They take them apart and bring them inside and reconstruct them!!!

the same way Santa Claus gets all those toys down the chimney

come on dude....don't you know? They take them apart and build them again...Didn't you ever see Real Genius?

hahahahah good question - man, now that i think of it, i have absolutely no idea - there doesn't seem to be any entranceway that is large enough to fit them thru! i would say some delivery area, but at the same time, i don't see any entranceways into the mall that it could go thru once it went thru the docking station - hmmmmm very good question

First they use a debigulator, to shrink the cars down. What do they do once the cars are inside you ask? "Well, that would require some sort of a re-bigulator, which is a concept so ridiculous it makes me want to laugh out loud and chortle."

What, you never watched Star Trek? They are teleported. They used to use WonkaVision, but Hot Wheel sized demo cars where stolen quite frequently and ended up in some 5 year old’s collection.

a little butter and a lot of pushing

By helicopter stupid!

smoke and mirrors

They don't. Those are holograms. If it were a real car, actually for sale, you'd have 3 salesmen up your ass asking "what can I do to get you into this car today?"

Wedgie chair

Someone screwed with the seat at my desk. I know this because I have a wedgie 8 miles deep this morning. And no matter how much I try to adjust my seat... Moving it up. Moving it down. Tilting it forward. Tilting it back... I still keep getting a wedgie.

It might have been the cleaning people. I'm pretty convinced those people eat my Chips Ahoy that are stashed at my desk too. And they always rearrange my garabage cans but hardly ever take the garbage out of them. I think I hate the cleaning people. They are bullies and can do whatever they want to your area after hours. They are "The Gooch" to my Arnold Drummond. I may have to involve Mrs. Garrett on this one.

Is messing with a desk chair in the same family of crimes as stealing baked pieces of saturated fat from a desk drawer? I'd actually argue that messing with a desk chair is worse. Having an uncomfortable, wedgie-producing chair is something I have to deal with all day, while missing a few cookies only saddens me at snack time.

I have tried a couple of times to stand up, adjust my pants and untuck my shirt a little to no avail. It is still Wedgie-Mania 3 over here.

If you have any suggestions on how to rectify the situation, I'm all ears.

QOTD: gleaming the cube

question of the day: what strange things have you seen people doing in their cubicle/office?

clipping their toe nails. yeah and it wasn't even in a cube, it was in [dept] where there isn't a cube, but rather a station

I've seen people working...weirdos.

clip their finger nails

one time, i saw somebody wrapping everything in someone's cube in tin foil. I mean everything - pencils, loose change, telephone... they even tin foiled the floor. That was cool.

Clipping their fingernails. Serving themselves what looked to be a 7 course meal. And the worst was I once saw a person walk into someone else’s cube, fart, and then leave so the gas stayed behind.

i saw a really gross lady in our office with her shoes off and her bare feet up her desk -

lets see....i have picked my nose, scratched my nuts, flung boogers at [coworker]....Have seen people sleeping, whacking off, typing their resume......

Auto repair. How exactly did they get the car into the builiding?

i don't think i've seen anything really strange. but my friend at my old job said there was an intern at work who would blatently look at porn at work and try and hide the screen with an excel doc...but he was sharing a room with other people and they could see what he was viewing from the glare on their monitor .... and somebody else told him to stop and he continued, but tried to hide it better. eventually hr had to step in and also tell him mom (who worked there and got him the job). people are RETARDED.

Penguins, Antarctica of them

picking their nose, obviously farting, sleeping, staring at you in the mirror on their desk as you walk by, falling of their chair, crying

1) The woman behind me likes to stretch her legs while sitting on her desk ina…well..uhm..a spread eagle like form, and once stated that the only time she has rhythm is when a black man is under her 2) Our tech has sleep apnea which makes him fall asleep and snore sounding like a rottweiler (very funny to hear) 3) The one manager likes to quote O&A and actually performed a nazi walk to illustrate something he heard on that show (yeah that one went to HR). He also likes to do the cranial facial spelunking thing when he thinks no one is watching...yummy 4) Coworker next to me likes to berate the network engineer group, LOUDLY, and call them a bunch of d#cks (out of jest of course) on a daily basis, but with variety 5) A now EX-employee (I wonder why) liked to remind everyone that he could kill them all very easily and stated that he wanted to eat another co-worker’s liver (Chianti and fava beans anyone?) 6) Two co-workers in the same department argued over the thermostat with the end result of one of them getting fired for telling the other one that the only reason why she was hot was because she was a fat pig
I could go on, but I have only scratched the surface.. I love corporate life!!

[coworker] picking his nose

QOTD: are you hitting on me?

question of the day: is there such a thing as harmless flirting? why or why not?

It's the spice of life!!!!!

plead the 5th

it all depends on who its between - if both people know its just harmless flirting and there is absolutely no real intent behind it, than yes; usually, however, there is intent between at least one of the people, which than makes it not harmless anymore

It seems like a person often considers flirting harmless when they themselves aren’t being harmed. The catch is when the harmless flirter doesn’t realize (or care) that the person they’re flirting with is being harmed. I guess it depends on the situation.

No. If you have a significant other and you are flirting, your significant other could be hurt by hearing about or seeing you flirt first hand. If you are single and you are flirting, you may have no intentions of starting a relationship with the person, but they may have feelings for you that will be hurt when they realize that you were just flirting and not actually giving them a signal. Also, if you are single and flirting with someone that has no interest in you, you are going to look really dumb or they are going to be offended/slap you with a sexual harassment lawsuit or worse - a restraining order. 500 yards means 500 yards people, regardless of how high-powered you claim your binoculars are.

Absolutely. It's the intent behind it that matters. If you're flirting just to flirt and maybe boost your ego a bit, that's fine. If you're flirting to see where you can get with that person and maybe act upon it that's not okay. This is all assuming that you're involved with someone, otherwise it's a moot point.

Of course there is such a thing as harmless flirting. I think humans need validation at a certain level from other people (besides their loved ones) that they are interesting, attractive, and sexy. If I could only talk to one female for the rest of my life, I think I'd shoot myself.

there is definately harmless flirting. and i see absolutely nothing wrong with it. it makes life a little more fun and interesting. just don't lead someone on... but if people are cool with it, play on.

Sort of. It depends on the likelyhood of anything actually happening. I just want a reason to write 'inversely propotional'. Ladies, does that make you hot? if so, call me at....

i guess so, but it depends on the motives and the method. for instance, if two people in committed relationships flirt with each other, but neither are really interested in anything more than that, i suppose it is harmless. but, if someone is aware that another person is interested in them, and they just flirt because they like the attention, but never intend on anything more, then thats destructive and hurtful. also, it depends on what you consider flirting. some people flirt without realizing it, and other people will grab your ass and say how bad they want to bleep you in your bleep, and think thats just a little harmless flirting.

As long as it stays harmless. I flirt all the time. Gets me free drinks, meals and the ladies are willing to provide work related info without the normal b#tching. Occasionally, I get a klinger, but as long as they don’t know where I live, it’s kewl..

Yes, it’s human nature. We all know where the line is, of course this is different for everyone. Flirting becomes harmful when people cross the line or put themselves in potentially bad situations.

Yes, there is. Why? It makes the day more fun

i think there is such a thing as harmless flirting. how do you think girls get out of tickets? j/k. i guess it's different if you're in a relationship, b/c it's only harmless if the other person in the relationship wouldn't be upset by it, regardless of the intent. if they would be upset, it's not really harmless. if they wouldn't be upset, wouldn't you wonder why?

QOTD: righteous jams

question of the day: what has been your summer jam this year?

i work. i dont have a summer or jam

I don't have a summer jam this year. Music sucks lately.

i got a new boyfriend. that is pretty jammin. LOL.

I can’t really think of one in particular for this summer. But my all time favorite summer jam… the 1991 hit “Summertime” by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince.

Dude, music is _so_ 2001. It's all about sports talk radio now. Get with the program.

Love Generation

Bob Sinclair - Love Generation, it's the song of the summer, whether you like it or not.

my air conditioner for the car has been broken for about three weeks now. i find it awesome.

strawberry

css - music is my hot hot sex

regina spektor- fidelity or the arcade fire- rebellion

Aimee Mann - Going Through the Motions

ohhhhhh, i just love that new Paris Hilton song! she's sooooo goooood.

Orange marmalade, all year round. If it's music you're referring to, well it has to be Gnarls Barkley. I've been hooked on Danger Mouse and Skeelo for a while now. I'm psyched to go see them next week.

i'm totally rocking out to 'dance,dance" by fall out boy. it kicks ass on the treadmill. i could listen to it over and over again!!!

It's hard out there for a Pimp. It speaks to me.

margarittaville jimmy buffet

Offbeat Bare-Ass. 311

QOTD: war

question of the day: israel and lebanon - what do you think of this situation? who is right, who is wrong?

both are wrong and they should just stop their fighting...They are like 2 little kids who want to sit in the front seat of the car.

Mel Gibson said it best... (just kidding of course)

its a really sad situation - both have valid points and i feel bad for both of them really.

Wow... I'm not sure I want to get into this one. I think I might end up offending someone. Did you see the movie Munich? It gives a good perspective into the circle of revenge. I guess I'm a little torn. I mean I do question the excessive force being used by Israel, but in a world where just about everyone wants to see Israel destroyed the Israelis have little choice but to take the offensive when their security is challenged. There is one certain thing that I know? war will not lead to peace between these nations. It hasn?t over the last 100 centuries so why does anyone think it will work now? Peace and concession is the only option that stands a chance.

I think Israel shouldn't have called Lebanon fat, but I heard Lebanon tell Syria that Israel is a slut.

God is wrong. She should really stick to overseeing the outcome of major sporting events, and appearing in silhouette form in burritos. The whole "my god is right, your god is wrong; so I'm going to kill you" BS is really tiring and very childish.

Israel vs. Lebanon
Who is right and who is wrong
Tryin to figure out who's side I'm on
Kinda makes me want to break into a song

Got these crazy old rockets
And they're flyin 'cross the border
Little children stugglin
For food and for water

It's just a piece of land
I don't care who is strong
And just like Rodney King
Can't we all get along?

The US, UK, and Russia were wrong for giving the Jews Israel after WW2. They should have given them some place that no one cared about.. like Utah.

as an isolated incident lebanon was wrong for initiating tension between Lebanon and isreal. but I don’t think it should be looked at this way. all the frustrations, wars, anger is a compiliation of years of suppression in the middle east. generally, i think isreal reactions are terriblely oppressive. the palestinans live as second class citizens in isreal, have limited access to water, transportation, etc. life is so terrible that they are willing to die for freedom. when you have nothing, there is nothing to loose. i don't agree with how all this started, and preferred it was in support of a palenstian state. i realize i didn't answer the question...but its just a hard question to answer.

They are both wrong. Killing is wrong.

i know nothing about isreal and lebanon other than hezbollah has ties to iran

First thing Israel should stop its offensive on Lebanese territory. Someone should smack Israel with the back of the hand. Hezbollah has been shown who is the boss. Trying to force its way through Lebanon to wipe out exactly what? Without being heartless, there will be casualties in war, children dying is an unfortunate thing. However this is not war, no one has declared war, there are no 2 sides fighting the war. One does not snoop into another’s territory to see if there is a truck roughly the size of a missile launcher and then proceed to fry it. If there was a war crimes tribunal set up today, it seems like it will beat the time it took to control and punish Nazi Germany. It’s been speculated that Israel is using cluster bombs, bombs that target certain areas of human body. Specifically limbs, thereby leaving the injured handicapped even to move or shake a hand.

All this while Lebanon’s fault has not been brought up – why? Because the shock that Israel is generating every minute is taking away all the attention. Without a doubt Israel has extended its “defense mechanism” strategy.
Funny thing, Israel’s big brother is not saying much, the big brothers terminal applauder declared he won’t say anything. Bottom Feeders all.